The boy has been acting strange lately. I’m a little worried, but he has gone through so many phases and changes in his short (5 year) life, that I’m not too worried. He does everything to get my attention, good or bad, but pushes me away when I try to give him attention. He fights non-stop with his sister and says she’s not his friend, then cries (I mean actual tears) when it’s time for her to go to her dad’s. He says one day he doesn’t want to go to his sitters anymore because “she is mean” and “she yells at [him],” then says the next day how much he wants to go to her house. I’ve been wondering what was going on with him, chalking it up to growing pains and being 5, but then it occurred to me…Mr. W is gone. Mr. W has been gone for a little over a month now and just before he left, they were starting to bond quite a bit. The boy was comfortable with Mr. W and was acting himself around him, and then he left for Iraq. Ah, ha! With so many people in and out of the boy’s life, it’s no wonder he is pushing people away and acting the way he is. He is trying to find his place in this ever-changing world and pushing his boundaries to make sure they are still there. My poor baby boy! I never really thought this would be so hard on him. I figured he’s young, he doesn’t know what’s going on, and has no concept of time…but…the boy is smart. I know all mothers say that about their kids, but really, he’s smart. He gets things that I don’t expect him to get. He remembers things I don’t expect him to remember, that I don’t even remember. He puts things together that I don’t expect him to put together. He’s smart. So the change and the in and out of his dad, my second husband, and now Mr. W has stepped out for the time being at least. It never occurred to me that this would be hard on him.
So what am I going to do about it? I haven’t a clue. I will try to talk to him more, keep him in the loop so to speak, so he isn’t picking up bits and pieces and trying to put them together to make sense. I will give him lots of love and attention, extra even. i will talk about Mr. W a lot and get him involved in the packages and letters I send. Other than that, I have no idea…hmmm…
