Lose/lose…is there any other way?

Work….what can I say. It’s a never ending cause of frustration. Just when one “issue” gets resolved, another seems to sprout up immediately in it’s place. I guess you could say it makes the days go by faster.

I make a conscious effort to be friendly and approachable to those around me, especially those I have to see everyday. I suffer from extreme shyness, and in the past, my shyness has often been misconstrued as indifference, smugness, or conceit. The only way I’ve found to combat this is to be overly smiley and friendly. Unfortunately, that often gets misconstrued as kissing up, or worse, when taken in context with my appearance, flirting. It seems to be a lose/lose situation. Ok, I will admit I’m cute. I can’t do anything about that. I like to look nice/professional when at work, and at times my lack of situational awareness or attention to detail in my clothing can leave me a little on the provocative side. My bad. But I don’t do it to get that kind of attention. That is the last thing I want (seriously, the last), however, that is the first thing I seem to get. The attention is nothing so noticeable to me, possibly because I have dealt with that sort of thing for years now, since changing my approach to people I don’t know and joining the adult workforce. However others around me see it, and it seems to bother them. There are apparently lingering looks once I’ve past, or extra efforts made to engage me in conversation that is uncharacteristic of the engaging person. Even less obvious to me are the extra-friendly “hellos” in the halls. Call it naivety or whatever you want. My initial thought is that they are just being friendly back.

I’m not sure what to do about these things. I don’t intend to change my way of being. I don’t like to be thought of as “stuck-up” in a social aspect, but it is definately NOT the impression I want to make in a professional aspect. I could change my manner of dress, but I’ve found that no matter how you dress, someone will take it the wrong way. So I’m stuck. Like I said, lose/lose.